Dapper Boi

Anonymous asked: How did you know you were trans? I've been questioning my own gender identity lately and I get so frustrated with not knowing who I am. Was there something that just screamed OF COURSE THIS IS ME or was it something else? How long did it take before you knew for sure?

For the longest time I didn’t know any trans* people or what trans* even was to know that I identified with it.  I knew I felt different, but I didn’t know why.  I met my first trans* friend about three years ago, and at first I didn’t realize how similar we were.  I was extremely interested in him and his story, but wasn’t quite sure why.  It took me about two years after learning about the trans* community to come out.  It was a very slow process and I didn’t feel rushed.  I just spent a lot of time figuring out what I was comfortable with and what fit.  I talked to a lot of trans people and read a lot of books and learned as much as I could.  I made changes and expressed myself in different ways to see what worked for me.  Trans* is a huge umbrella term that includes so many different identities.  I think it is important to remember that you don’t have to find yourself in anyone else, you have the power to define yourself and make completely original categories. If there aren’t words that currently scream out to you, create your own.  I am a trans guy, I’m taking T, and I just had top surgery.  That isn’t the only story or path.  I know plenty of trans* folks who don’t take hormones, who are genderqueer or gender fluid.  Take it slow, look to other people for guidance or similarity in stories but don’t expect to fit into another person’s mold perfectly.  Try things out, see how they work, and change them if they don’t.  All people are constantly learning and changing and growing, so you don’t have to know anything for sure.  Find what makes you feel good and go with it, whatever it is.